Sunday, May 24, 2009
The Jurassic Park Trilogy: Jurassic Park III.
I never realized camcorders could last 8 weeks on a tropical rain forest infested with dinosaurs, survive the elements and then play film after just replacing the battery. I never realized how realistic it was that 4 adult males in a search party all armed and supposedly trained could die in under two days while a young boy between the age of 12-14 could survive 8 weeks by himself. I never realized that a monophonic ringtone from a satellite phone in the belly of a Spinosaurus could be heard, especially through dense jungle. I would like an explanation of how the young boy somehow collected a bottle of T Rex urine. The response of 'you don't want to know' when questioned by Dr Grant in regards to its' acquirement was a lazy way of saying - ' we don't have any possible explanation for this.' The formula for each Jurassic Park film contains at least one super ridiculously annoying character that has to be mega oblivious and obnoxious, spiraling everyone else into danger. That makes for annoying viewing. Luckily the trilogy is here to think, so you don't have to. It's a no-brainer, don't watch this film.
- L
This film is like DINOSAUR DINOSAUR DINOSAUR DINOSAUR DINOSAUR end. Which is cool if you're making a visual effects reel to show off dinosaurs. If you're making a film with characters and a plot (plot?) then it's not a particularly useful tactic. Watching this film continually violate every single internal law it sets up for itself is a pretty amazing thing to witness and I don't think I've seen it done better since Hitman. Wow. Hitman was horrible. This is worse though. The spinosaurus was badarse. My jaw literally dropped and stayed there for about a minute when the army rolled up on the beach. Seriously amazing. Sam Neill (he's back, dammit) said something about a river to Laura Dern on the phone and she somehow convinced the army to roll up on Isla Sorna and save dudez. I was shocked. I'm still shocked. This film is well made. Kind of. The dinosaurs aren't even good. Lost World had better ones. Lost World seriously had better visual effects than this hunk of T-Rex crap. Apparently Joe Johnston asked to direct The Lost World but Spielberg said he could do the third. Spielberg should have punched him in the face.
- Mike.
Dinosaurs are cool. Making movies of them is not.
-AJ
Saturday, May 23, 2009
The Jurassic Park Trilogy: The Lost World
Previously, I had believed The Village to be the worst film I've seen in my 18 years of life. I feel really sorry for Mike because he bought the film. Sucker. What girl stows herself away in a vehicle destined for an island infested with dinosaurs and then decides to light a fire to cook breakfast on said island? When two people are stationed looking over your camp on a dinosaur-infested island and they are the only possible people who can call your phone and you decide to look at a wounded dinosaur leg instead of answering the phone, you deserve to die.
- L
This film was annoying. It was so cool in bits and the dinosaurs looked real and everything but it was just dumb thing after dumb thing. The two kids shows up from the first one and you're all like "OH NO" but then they're gone again after about a minute of screen time. Sick. Goldblum's daughter is the worst ever, why does she go with them? There's fricken dinosaurs there. Didn't she know that? Actually maybe she didn't. Either way, ugh. Julianna Moore is in there for some reason and so is Pete Postlethwaite. Vince Vaughn too. Random casting 6000. Peter Stomare gets killed by a load of little dinosaurs and Richard Schiff gets killed by two T-Rexs while trying to save everything which sucks. I am amazed this film was PG. If it were M people still probably would have taken their kids but it's definitely not a PG flick. Dudes get ripped in half, a little girl gets messed up by dinosaurs. Weird. Spielberg makes good flicks but this is unarguably one of his worst.
- Mike
T-Rex + screaming black girl + highly dangerous environment = disappointing survival.
- AJ
Next up: Jurassic Park 3.
The Jurassic Park Trilogy: Jurassic Park
(Worst kids ever.)
You would have to be retarded to fall into the danger that they experienced. Stupid unbackable storyline.
- L
This film is pretty sweet. I can't work out if it's a film for kids or a film for adults though. It's pretty violent and somewhat disturbing (if you're a kid) but it's also really fluffy and kiddish. Sam Neill (who I don't like) is some dude who likes dinosaurs and Richard Attenborough pays him and Laura Dern some money to come and get chased and nearly killed a lot. Jeff Goldblum shows up as a mathematician which is sweet. The kids in this film suck. L almost couldn't handle the sheer annoyingness of the girl because she seriously just screamed at everything. Sam Neill could have been like "sup" and she would have screamed. Annoying and stupid. If this film didn't have the kids it would probably rule a lot harder. The velociraptors were the best bit for sure. I kind of wish the park actually existed. That would rule.
- Mike
Rich capitalist pig + gullible, stupid scientists + claws & teeth = stupid.
- AJ
The Lost World is up next.
The Blade Trilogy
We watched the Blade trilogy: Blade, Blade 2, Blade Trinity. Trinity?
Blade
Possibly the worst DVD menu in history. What that counts toward this movie review is actually extremely important. Being the film connossieur I am - and you are not - you would not care about this. That's why I have a blog and you don't. Why does biting into humans have to be so erotic?
- L
I used to watch this film a lot being one of the early DVDs I bought when I was a kid. It's a really grim flick that I still don't really know what to make of. Kris Kristofferson is in it which is a REALLY strong start. Wesley Snipes, darkest man in the universe is in it too which is fun. There's not a lot to the story. It's just a vampire flick with some vampire hunting and ends in a fist fight. Why do so many films end in fist fights? Is it some kind of social commentary or some junk? Anyway this flick is fun but it's kind of depressing.
- Mike
Vampires + black guy + pure hatred = no more vampires.
- AJ
Blade 2
Since when can't a sword not cut through bone? Unstabbable hearts? Ridiculous.
- L
I like this one the best because Guillermo Del Toro directed it and he rules (sup The Hobbit, 2011/2012). It's got the best action and the best design for creatures and everything. There's some dude who's jaw opens up real wide like a snake or something and he has something to do with the story but generally it's just more vampire hunting. It all looks really cool. Wesley smiles a lot which is pretty funny in context and that Scud sidekick guy really sucked. I'd have edited him out of the film if I were Guillermo. I think it ended in a fist fight too. Oh well. Not every Del Toro film can end with a little spanish girl dying. Actually they probably all could, it just wouldn't make sense. The end of this is actually heaps like the end of 30 Days of Night which is weird.
- Mike
Black guy + more vampires + pure hatred = no vampires.
- AJ
Blade Trinity
I'm annoyed that the blind lady died. As if they would make that happen because she was so innocent. I thoroughly enjoyed Ryan Reynolds' smart alec comments to his captors. Reminds me of me except 15kg lighter, 15% less body fat, taller and ex-vampire.
- L
Trinity? This film was really annoying. Ryan Reynolds gets third rate punch lines that undermine his comedic talent and make him look completely stupid although he is fairly buff. Triple H shows up (why?), Parker Posey is in there somewhere, same with Jessica Biel. They don't do heaps. The vampire hunting league (or something) have a blind lady who does most of their work which was pretty silly. John Michael Higgins is wasted in a weird little role which attempts to poke fun at how vampires have gotten media attention. Lame movie.
- Mike
Black guy + vampires + pure hatred = no more vampires.
- AJ
Trilogy Summary
I wonder: if we had watched this in the daytime, would all the light have been absorbed by Wesley Snipe's blackness?
-L
Could have left it at the two films. I think I'm slowly learning that trilogies have to be pre-conceived to be of any use at all. Stuff like this is just cash-in gimmicky junk.
- Mike
Black sunglasses + black leather + black man = pure darkness.
- AJ
Trilogy Grade
58.16/100.
- L
65/100.
- Mike
50/100.
- AJ
Blade
Possibly the worst DVD menu in history. What that counts toward this movie review is actually extremely important. Being the film connossieur I am - and you are not - you would not care about this. That's why I have a blog and you don't. Why does biting into humans have to be so erotic?
- L
I used to watch this film a lot being one of the early DVDs I bought when I was a kid. It's a really grim flick that I still don't really know what to make of. Kris Kristofferson is in it which is a REALLY strong start. Wesley Snipes, darkest man in the universe is in it too which is fun. There's not a lot to the story. It's just a vampire flick with some vampire hunting and ends in a fist fight. Why do so many films end in fist fights? Is it some kind of social commentary or some junk? Anyway this flick is fun but it's kind of depressing.
- Mike
Vampires + black guy + pure hatred = no more vampires.
- AJ
Blade 2
Since when can't a sword not cut through bone? Unstabbable hearts? Ridiculous.
- L
I like this one the best because Guillermo Del Toro directed it and he rules (sup The Hobbit, 2011/2012). It's got the best action and the best design for creatures and everything. There's some dude who's jaw opens up real wide like a snake or something and he has something to do with the story but generally it's just more vampire hunting. It all looks really cool. Wesley smiles a lot which is pretty funny in context and that Scud sidekick guy really sucked. I'd have edited him out of the film if I were Guillermo. I think it ended in a fist fight too. Oh well. Not every Del Toro film can end with a little spanish girl dying. Actually they probably all could, it just wouldn't make sense. The end of this is actually heaps like the end of 30 Days of Night which is weird.
- Mike
Black guy + more vampires + pure hatred = no vampires.
- AJ
Blade Trinity
I'm annoyed that the blind lady died. As if they would make that happen because she was so innocent. I thoroughly enjoyed Ryan Reynolds' smart alec comments to his captors. Reminds me of me except 15kg lighter, 15% less body fat, taller and ex-vampire.
- L
Trinity? This film was really annoying. Ryan Reynolds gets third rate punch lines that undermine his comedic talent and make him look completely stupid although he is fairly buff. Triple H shows up (why?), Parker Posey is in there somewhere, same with Jessica Biel. They don't do heaps. The vampire hunting league (or something) have a blind lady who does most of their work which was pretty silly. John Michael Higgins is wasted in a weird little role which attempts to poke fun at how vampires have gotten media attention. Lame movie.
- Mike
Black guy + vampires + pure hatred = no more vampires.
- AJ
Trilogy Summary
I wonder: if we had watched this in the daytime, would all the light have been absorbed by Wesley Snipe's blackness?
-L
Could have left it at the two films. I think I'm slowly learning that trilogies have to be pre-conceived to be of any use at all. Stuff like this is just cash-in gimmicky junk.
- Mike
Black sunglasses + black leather + black man = pure darkness.
- AJ
Trilogy Grade
58.16/100.
- L
65/100.
- Mike
50/100.
- AJ
The Matrix Trilogy
We watched the Matrix trilogy: The Matrix, The Matrix Reloaded, The Matrix Revolutions. For the record, none of us know why the second and third films are named what they are. If you know, please tell us.
The Matrix
For the 90's, groundbreaking.
- L
I used to watch this film once a week when I was about 12 or 13. I really liked it because I thought it looked cool. It still looks cool but the script is puss which is kind of ironic given it's probably the best written film of the three. There aren't many sequences filled with character spouting endless torrents of stupid "enlightened" dialogue like the other two. There aren't too many dumb questions an answer sessions (like "What choice do I have to make?", "You are not here to find out what choice you have to make, but why you are going to make it"...great, thanks) and Joe Pantoliano is probably the worst character in this film and even then he's pretty good. The ending doesn't really scream sequel either so I see the two films that follow as pretty useless in hindsight. Kind of like doing The Green Mile Reloaded or The Shawkshank Redemption Revolutions.
- Mike
Morpheus + Neo + body plugs = wired relationship.
- AJ
The Matrix Reloaded
For the 2000's, not so groundbreaking. Seeing a lady have an orgasm via the showing of a computer generated vagina was unncessary, thanks Wachowski brothers.
- Lotty
Aside from the nonsensical title this film is okay. The cave rave scene is probably the worst part of the film so maybe watch that first cause everything gets better from there. Commander Lock is basically frustrated and annoyed literally the entire film, flaring his nostrils super wide (maybe to make the plot holes seem smaller in comparison) and yelling at Morpheus for being all hopeful and such. That old guy who talks to Neo about the water recycling machines never looks upset at all and doesn't really act. He would be cool to hang out with. A few dumb dialogue bits with the Oracle (who is cooler in this one than in the first one) and some cool fights. Let's face it, who watched these films for the characterization? The action and style are the only reason to watch this film which is something that can't be said for the third film (it only really has the style, and even then it's kind of lame) so anyone looking for a sweet backstory about Zion or something will be disappointed because Zion sucks anyway.
- Mike
Twin albinos + automobiles + leather = luxury car with albino bodyguards.
- AJ
The Matrix Revolutions
When your woman calls the shots whilst wearing tight leather pants( niobe) and the survival of the human race depends on you( commander lock), you need to get your woman in line. Thankfully a man saved them.
- L
The worst film which is bad considering it's the final one. Bad way to finish, Wachowskis. This film actually has Neo blind for about half of it (sounds exciting doesn't it!) and asks more questions posing as answers which in turn makes everyone feel confused and ripped off. After all, we were all looking for a conclusion to the story but what we ended up with was something vaguely resembling a Christological allegory with a fist fight in the rain (in the air, above a city) as the final "battle". I'm not kidding.
The worst shot in the film is when smith flies in to punch Neo while he's in the crater on the road. It looks like a set and it looks like he's on wires, both of which are true and both of which take you out of the movie and remind you that you're actually watching a huge peice of crap. Furthermore, the Oracle (the REAL Oracle) died before she could shoot her scenes for this so they got a lady who looks a little bit like her but is fifty thousand times more annoying and used the excuse that she had to find another shell. Why didn't she pick something different? She's a genderless computer program who can literally have any body she wants so why one that's only SLIGHTLY different to the last one? They even try to sell it by concluding her explaination with her saying "But I still like candy". OH HO HO GOOD HOMAGE. Ugh. Avoid this one.
- Mike
Maori captain + white kid + butt whooping = schooled.
- AJ
Trilogy Summary
Very decent. One of a kind. Everyone must watch; not because it is great but because it is unique.
- L
Didn't need to be a trilogy. Looks good and there's a few cool fights. You could probably make a showreel of the coolest bits from the films running at about 140 mins and that would be nice. But as it stands, first is good but second and third are useless.
- Mike
Concept + character development + special effects = winning formula.
- AJ
Trilogy Grade
74.15/100.
- L
50/100.
- Mike
80/100.
- AJ
The Matrix
For the 90's, groundbreaking.
- L
I used to watch this film once a week when I was about 12 or 13. I really liked it because I thought it looked cool. It still looks cool but the script is puss which is kind of ironic given it's probably the best written film of the three. There aren't many sequences filled with character spouting endless torrents of stupid "enlightened" dialogue like the other two. There aren't too many dumb questions an answer sessions (like "What choice do I have to make?", "You are not here to find out what choice you have to make, but why you are going to make it"...great, thanks) and Joe Pantoliano is probably the worst character in this film and even then he's pretty good. The ending doesn't really scream sequel either so I see the two films that follow as pretty useless in hindsight. Kind of like doing The Green Mile Reloaded or The Shawkshank Redemption Revolutions.
- Mike
Morpheus + Neo + body plugs = wired relationship.
- AJ
The Matrix Reloaded
For the 2000's, not so groundbreaking. Seeing a lady have an orgasm via the showing of a computer generated vagina was unncessary, thanks Wachowski brothers.
- Lotty
Aside from the nonsensical title this film is okay. The cave rave scene is probably the worst part of the film so maybe watch that first cause everything gets better from there. Commander Lock is basically frustrated and annoyed literally the entire film, flaring his nostrils super wide (maybe to make the plot holes seem smaller in comparison) and yelling at Morpheus for being all hopeful and such. That old guy who talks to Neo about the water recycling machines never looks upset at all and doesn't really act. He would be cool to hang out with. A few dumb dialogue bits with the Oracle (who is cooler in this one than in the first one) and some cool fights. Let's face it, who watched these films for the characterization? The action and style are the only reason to watch this film which is something that can't be said for the third film (it only really has the style, and even then it's kind of lame) so anyone looking for a sweet backstory about Zion or something will be disappointed because Zion sucks anyway.
- Mike
Twin albinos + automobiles + leather = luxury car with albino bodyguards.
- AJ
The Matrix Revolutions
When your woman calls the shots whilst wearing tight leather pants( niobe) and the survival of the human race depends on you( commander lock), you need to get your woman in line. Thankfully a man saved them.
- L
The worst film which is bad considering it's the final one. Bad way to finish, Wachowskis. This film actually has Neo blind for about half of it (sounds exciting doesn't it!) and asks more questions posing as answers which in turn makes everyone feel confused and ripped off. After all, we were all looking for a conclusion to the story but what we ended up with was something vaguely resembling a Christological allegory with a fist fight in the rain (in the air, above a city) as the final "battle". I'm not kidding.
The worst shot in the film is when smith flies in to punch Neo while he's in the crater on the road. It looks like a set and it looks like he's on wires, both of which are true and both of which take you out of the movie and remind you that you're actually watching a huge peice of crap. Furthermore, the Oracle (the REAL Oracle) died before she could shoot her scenes for this so they got a lady who looks a little bit like her but is fifty thousand times more annoying and used the excuse that she had to find another shell. Why didn't she pick something different? She's a genderless computer program who can literally have any body she wants so why one that's only SLIGHTLY different to the last one? They even try to sell it by concluding her explaination with her saying "But I still like candy". OH HO HO GOOD HOMAGE. Ugh. Avoid this one.
- Mike
Maori captain + white kid + butt whooping = schooled.
- AJ
Trilogy Summary
Very decent. One of a kind. Everyone must watch; not because it is great but because it is unique.
- L
Didn't need to be a trilogy. Looks good and there's a few cool fights. You could probably make a showreel of the coolest bits from the films running at about 140 mins and that would be nice. But as it stands, first is good but second and third are useless.
- Mike
Concept + character development + special effects = winning formula.
- AJ
Trilogy Grade
74.15/100.
- L
50/100.
- Mike
80/100.
- AJ
The Lord of the Rings - Extended Trilogy
We watched the extended edition of the Lord of the Rings trilogy: The Fellowship of the Ring, The Two Towers, The Return of the King.
The Fellowship of the Ring
It was really green.
- L
The second best of the trilogy. I hate the stupid bits in the shire with the dancing and the Hobbits generally being lame however the Ring Wraiths were pretty sweet. Actually the Hobbits were easily the worst thing about the film and perhaps the trilogy (besides Treebeard, but we'll get to that). Merri & Pippin are officially horrible. Admittedly, Peter Jackson kind of screwed up their characterization but they're the worst. Gandalf didn't put up too much of a fight either. Eh.
- Mike
Gandalf + queer Hobbits = LOL.
- AJ
The Two Towers
After many months of looking forward to watching the full Lord of the Rings trilogy I was very, very disappointed/frustrated/annoyed/angry/let down by AJ and his lack of patience for film. Basically, out of his boredom and sheer selfishness - or what some other people would call ignorance - he decided to fast forward 75% of the film giving his own commentary in a monotone, boring, mundane, un-creative, un-descriptive and overall stupid tone. "This is where Rohan gets all together" does not cover 45 minutes of story development. It is a shame I can't actually review this film because I have not seen it in its' entirity.
- L
The first disc of this extended edition is probably the most arduous watch next to Bertolucci's full 315 minute version of 1900 in the history of film. It seriously goes forever and consists of nothing but Gollum being a completely annoying drag and stupid Treebeard being the worst. I think Treebeard was on the first disc. I don't even remember.
The best part about watching this disc was AJ fast forwarding the boring bits without warning and giving a brief summary in the most annoyed tone possible over the sped-up footage. In fact, I'd love to see AJ do a full cut of LOTR including fast forwarded bits with him summarising what actually happens, because you could legitimately sum up about 75% of TTT's extended 223 minute running time in about 2 minutes. If that.
- Mike
Shoot me now.
- AJ
The Return of the King
After quite a few weeks, numerous organisational phone calls and petrol money it was fantastic to see the end of the Lord of the Rings trilogy after such a huge buildup (thanks to AJ). I hated the dumb steward of Gondor character and I think a kingdom where a tree that blooms signifying that the king is present cannot be questioned for its lameness, thus I have no further comments.
- L
Ah, the best one. This is where you thank Peter Jackson for stealing a total of 683 extended minutes of your life because he finishes it off really well. Samwise continues to flash makeout eyes at Frodo, who gets shut down by Shelob and remains catatonic for an unforgivably short amount of time. Viggo goes around showing all forms of bad-arsery and basically lays down the law non-stop (besides getting with Liv Tyler at the end) while holding the biggest sword film has ever seen or will ever see.
The day is saved by an army of ghosts (yes, ghosts), that really annoying king who was the worst dude jumps off that massive tower while on fire which was rad. Gollum dies (finally), huge hawks pick up Frodo and Samwise (it could happen), the film ends about six times (unfortunately they don't show Bilbo dying which I was upset about: I didn't like him as a character) and Samwise ends up ruling Hobbiton and probably becomes a pimp in some unpublished LOTR appendix. PJ obviously couldn't find that text but it's implied.
- Mike
Smeagle + queer Hobbits = LOL.
- AJ
Trilogy Summary
Promising, fun, time-consuming and (no) thanks to Aaron, brief.
- L
Will probably go down as one of the great trilogies in film. Pretty amazing despite all the annoying bits like Treebeard, the Hobbits, that doucher king who tried to light himself & David Wenham on fire, Hobbiton, Gollum, Merri & Pippin, Hagrid, Bilbo and every inch Gandalf gave the Hobbits who turned them into miles to ruin everything and slow everyone down while he fixes it all again.
- Mike
Epic battles + homestyle commentary + Frodo & Sam relationship = top quality trilogy fun.
- AJ
Trilogy Grade
Pre-AJ: 95/100. Post-AJ: 82.75/100.
- L
88/100.
- Mike
95/100.
- AJ
The Fellowship of the Ring
It was really green.
- L
The second best of the trilogy. I hate the stupid bits in the shire with the dancing and the Hobbits generally being lame however the Ring Wraiths were pretty sweet. Actually the Hobbits were easily the worst thing about the film and perhaps the trilogy (besides Treebeard, but we'll get to that). Merri & Pippin are officially horrible. Admittedly, Peter Jackson kind of screwed up their characterization but they're the worst. Gandalf didn't put up too much of a fight either. Eh.
- Mike
Gandalf + queer Hobbits = LOL.
- AJ
The Two Towers
After many months of looking forward to watching the full Lord of the Rings trilogy I was very, very disappointed/frustrated/annoyed/angry/let down by AJ and his lack of patience for film. Basically, out of his boredom and sheer selfishness - or what some other people would call ignorance - he decided to fast forward 75% of the film giving his own commentary in a monotone, boring, mundane, un-creative, un-descriptive and overall stupid tone. "This is where Rohan gets all together" does not cover 45 minutes of story development. It is a shame I can't actually review this film because I have not seen it in its' entirity.
- L
The first disc of this extended edition is probably the most arduous watch next to Bertolucci's full 315 minute version of 1900 in the history of film. It seriously goes forever and consists of nothing but Gollum being a completely annoying drag and stupid Treebeard being the worst. I think Treebeard was on the first disc. I don't even remember.
The best part about watching this disc was AJ fast forwarding the boring bits without warning and giving a brief summary in the most annoyed tone possible over the sped-up footage. In fact, I'd love to see AJ do a full cut of LOTR including fast forwarded bits with him summarising what actually happens, because you could legitimately sum up about 75% of TTT's extended 223 minute running time in about 2 minutes. If that.
- Mike
Shoot me now.
- AJ
The Return of the King
After quite a few weeks, numerous organisational phone calls and petrol money it was fantastic to see the end of the Lord of the Rings trilogy after such a huge buildup (thanks to AJ). I hated the dumb steward of Gondor character and I think a kingdom where a tree that blooms signifying that the king is present cannot be questioned for its lameness, thus I have no further comments.
- L
Ah, the best one. This is where you thank Peter Jackson for stealing a total of 683 extended minutes of your life because he finishes it off really well. Samwise continues to flash makeout eyes at Frodo, who gets shut down by Shelob and remains catatonic for an unforgivably short amount of time. Viggo goes around showing all forms of bad-arsery and basically lays down the law non-stop (besides getting with Liv Tyler at the end) while holding the biggest sword film has ever seen or will ever see.
The day is saved by an army of ghosts (yes, ghosts), that really annoying king who was the worst dude jumps off that massive tower while on fire which was rad. Gollum dies (finally), huge hawks pick up Frodo and Samwise (it could happen), the film ends about six times (unfortunately they don't show Bilbo dying which I was upset about: I didn't like him as a character) and Samwise ends up ruling Hobbiton and probably becomes a pimp in some unpublished LOTR appendix. PJ obviously couldn't find that text but it's implied.
- Mike
Smeagle + queer Hobbits = LOL.
- AJ
Trilogy Summary
Promising, fun, time-consuming and (no) thanks to Aaron, brief.
- L
Will probably go down as one of the great trilogies in film. Pretty amazing despite all the annoying bits like Treebeard, the Hobbits, that doucher king who tried to light himself & David Wenham on fire, Hobbiton, Gollum, Merri & Pippin, Hagrid, Bilbo and every inch Gandalf gave the Hobbits who turned them into miles to ruin everything and slow everyone down while he fixes it all again.
- Mike
Epic battles + homestyle commentary + Frodo & Sam relationship = top quality trilogy fun.
- AJ
Trilogy Grade
Pre-AJ: 95/100. Post-AJ: 82.75/100.
- L
88/100.
- Mike
95/100.
- AJ
The Trilogy Blog - A Welcome.
Welcome to the Trilogy blog. It is comprised of three people with one goal. To watch every movie trilogy. Maybe ever. We haven't decided that yet. But for now, every one ever. Basically, we select a trilogy and work our way through watching all of the films in it together. We then post our thoughts and deliberations on here to form a concise guide to trilogies for those who fear to enter such a movie watching agreement.
The Trilogy is made up of three members:
AJ Crawford
- Aaron is a geek who enjoys pumping copious amounts of iron while playing Empire: Total War, reading about anything to do with war and eating KFC.
Mike Haydon
- Mike is a dweeb who answers phones for a living who enjoys watching movies with commentary, kicking things and eating scones with jam & cream because they're sick.
L
- L was previously a school captain but now is a Business student who enjoys speaking fast, asking a lot of questions and smiling more than Richard Branson.
We will park ourselves in Aaron's home theater every chance we get to bring you THRILLING THOUGHTS ABOUT FILM. Feel free to leave comments and we might respond to them. Maybe.
Prepare yourself.
The Trilogy is made up of three members:
AJ Crawford
- Aaron is a geek who enjoys pumping copious amounts of iron while playing Empire: Total War, reading about anything to do with war and eating KFC.
Mike Haydon
- Mike is a dweeb who answers phones for a living who enjoys watching movies with commentary, kicking things and eating scones with jam & cream because they're sick.
L
- L was previously a school captain but now is a Business student who enjoys speaking fast, asking a lot of questions and smiling more than Richard Branson.
We will park ourselves in Aaron's home theater every chance we get to bring you THRILLING THOUGHTS ABOUT FILM. Feel free to leave comments and we might respond to them. Maybe.
Prepare yourself.
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